The irritable scratchy crop circles and my day of wreckoning, Larry Craig spreads 'em, and delves deeper, Elvis Costello in Nashville, Britney Spears' slowly grabbed breasts, and "slow is the new sensual"
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I WAS MOST FORTUNATE TO BE ABLE to hear and see Elvis Costello with the Nashville Symphony two nights ago. The first half of the program was devoted to one of Costello's larger works, the orchestral, instrumental score, "Il Sogno," followed by a few other works. The second half consisted of Elvis singing with the orchestra, accompanied by his longtime/forever pianist, Steve Nieve. Throughout the entire concert there was a lot of celesta and cimbalom, great instruments that need to be heard more often.
Elvis' singing, repertoire selection and humor were exceptional - damn great concert. The NSO played really well also, and the great Schermerhorn Symphony Center was its usual acoustically pretty self. But by tiny bit, "pretty" sounds in a pretty hall pretty hall applies more to the sound than the hall. I was sitting in a loge box above the trombone and reading his part and squinting to see some of the trumpet parts as well. Having orchestral parts to see below is always fun.
If it wasn't Elvis Costello himself doing these orchestrations...... Well, nevermind.
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September 9 was the 4th anniversary of Senator Dick Durbin's (D-IL) great line to the RIAA and their then new thug technique of suing 12 year olds and dead octagenarians named "Walton" from Iowa who file share or don't (because they're dead and don't own computers) - "Are you headed to junior high schools to round up the usual suspects?" Appropriately, and cosmically enough, as I am writing this, Elvis Costello's "How To Be Dumb" is playing.
"Are you ready to take your place in the modern museum of mistakes?" from the chorus of "How To Be Dumb" is even more appropriate in 2007 than in 2003.
Yes, that line perfectly suits the suits at the RIAA.
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YESTERDAY, I had physical tests for more than four and one half hours. I had psychedellic glowing stuff pumped into my veins so that I would,
1. glow, and
2. not be able to hide any strange things inside my body as they took photographs or NMR'ed or performed some other scientific experiments on me at 2400 Patterson Street.
It wasn't that bad - I only saw one person who looked like Cousin It or Lurch. 2400 Patterson Street was not a horror film - just a place where a lot of people are getting tested for medical issues. I also got a stress test where I got to walk and run as fast as I could on a treadmill (I've been near those damn things but always opted for the better and more sophisticated machines, or for happy hour - yesterday was my day of reck/wreckoning like it or not - hello treadmill, how are you?). The good news is that I surpassed what they thought I could do - I reached Level 6 of 7, with a pulse of over 180, and survived with cords attached to my strangely shaved chest - the woman managed to shave circular spots on me while she conversed with me - damn it, she was good at what she did - while she attached things to me. Today I am left with CROP CIRCLES ON MY CHEST that are irritable and itchy. My Irish skin is irritated and bothering me a lot. I need relief, someone who can empathize with and nurture these CROP CIRCLES so they become wooded and heavily forested again. It's time to bring back trees and bushes where arid circles now lie.
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LARRY CRAIG
FINALLY, I owe a great THANK YOU to Senator Larry "I-Stand-Wide" Craig for his opting to give me days and hopefully weeks more of good humor. I wanted him to stick in (did I just write that?), stand wide and take it, and defend himself. He is only a U. S. Senator so obviously he would not have known the meaning of a written document that spelled out that he was pleading guilty to some sort of action. Larry will delve deeper into dishonesty and avoiding the truth. I wish him a good revelation and acceptance. Being happy with one's sexual preference is a damn good thing, in my rarely humble opinion.
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BRITNEY BRITNEY BRITNEY....
And I think Britney Spears looked good moving SLOWLY walking downstairs SLOWLY, having gay male dancers grab her breasts SLOWLY, with soft non-ripped skin (she's had 12 kids or was it 2?) and singing out of synch with MP3's backstage at the VMA's. I think slow will become the new sensual. Britney is freeing old and slow people. If she can be slow, so can they/we. Her AARP card is not yet in the mail.
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